Top Ten Best Teen Couples

Now that we have the negatives out of the way, I thought it would be nice to focus on the positives in teen romance on Valentine's Day. Again, these are my ten favourite teen couples so they probably won't coincide with your own favourites but feel free to share your own in the comments or elsewhere. I think it's fun to find out what couples worked for some people and what couples didn't. If you've been reading this blog for a while, I'm sure you'll be able to guess at least a couple of the couples on my list but you might be surprised by their placement. I'll explain, of course, and I hope you enjoy.

Anyway, on this sacred holiday of love, invented by the Hallmark Corporation to sell more cards, it's about time we dive right in to my Top Ten Best Teen Couples:

10) Torrance and Cliff - Bring It On

Aren't they cute?

I did not expect to like this movie as much as I did, even when I was a teen seeing it for the first time but it was so much goofy fun that I just fell in love. This is one of those silly movies that I can watch over and over again and still enjoy just because it makes me happy and part of that is the dynamic between Torrance and Cliff. Sure, he's kind of an added love interest amidst the real meat of the cheer competitions and super serious cheer fights but there was still a lot to like about them as a couple...or I guess as a potential couple.

I like the fact that he's not intimidated by her smarts, for starters. Yeah, I know, it was supposed to be playful banter between them and Torrance isn't really interested in taking advanced chemistry but the fact that he isn't intimidated by her trying to achieve more is nice. Usually guys are portrayed as being super threatened by smart girls and it's just dumb. So that was point one to Cliff but I also love how he recognized when Torrance was feeling down or stressed he didn't fix her problems for her (unlike Aaron, may he rest in peace) he talked her through them and gave her the motivation to work through her problems on her own. It was nice to see that kind of thing between a teen couple where so many teen romances have the guy need to rush in and rescue the girl because she can't possibly handle things on her own (I'm looking at you, She's All That). These two made perfect sense to me and they were fun to watch together, even their weird toothbrushing/spitting flirting ritual was weirdly cute.

Just me? Come on...it was weirdly cute...right?

9) Kat and Patrick - 10 Things I Hate About You

RIP Heath Ledger

This was hands down, one of my favourite teen rom coms of the time. This is another one that I can watch over and over and I've got to give it props that it managed to make a very, very, misogynistic play by Shakespeare (The Taming of the Shrew) and managing to improve it with modernization. Unlike She's All That, this story actually makes you believe that Kat and Patrick would fall for each other and you understand why she would forgive him for beginning to date her under false pretenses. This is because, at the beginning of the movie, neither one of them really knows the other that well and Patrick's background and demeanor at the beginning makes it believable that he would go along with the plan, even if he questions the morality of it. Actually, if you ask me, Cameron comes off pretty bad in this. Paying someone to take out a girl's sister just so he can attempt to date the girl is pretty shitty and he never really apologizes for it.

But, I digress. Kat and Patrick's relationship always felt like it was moving forward, from acquaintances who despise each other, to sort of friends, to romantic partners and it feels natural all the way through. You get why they fall in love, because they are both harsh personalities that are somewhat misunderstood, and they both have a wild side to them. Also, who doesn't love a guy that will sing to you in front of a bunch of people, even if it embarrasses him and gets him detention?

Magical

Also, this scene is just cute and made me want to try paintball with how much fun they made it look:

They lie. Paintballs hurt like a motherfucker and I will never try it again

8) Lindsay and Nick - Freaks and Geeks

They definitely had their moments

I love this show! If Dawson's Creek was my guilty pleasure, and Buffy was my fantasy and hero, then Freaks and Geeks was the show that really actually got what being a teenager was about. It was the show I identified with and could really see myself in. If you haven't seen it then please, go watch it now it's on Netflix, go!

I may be cheating a little bit with this one. Nick and Lindsay are an extremely awkward couple and it was mostly played for laughs but I always thought there were some genuinely sweet moments between these two. You can tell Nick is way more into Lindsay right from the beginning which leads to some hilariously uncomfortable moments for her but lead to much entertainment for me.

Even still, I enjoyed them because I thought Nick, at least at the beginning, was incredibly sweet to her. He recognized that she was feeling down and tried his best to cheer her up or motivate her to find something that would make her happy, like he had with his drums. When Nick was feeling shit about himself, Lindsay stood by him and encouraged him to pursue his dreams of becoming a drummer, even going so far as to set him up an audition with a local band. It backfired horribly but it was sweet all the same and was the catalyst to them getting together. Now, Lindsay was not that into Nick which is the reason they are not higher on this list but she still tried with him and was genuinely upset when they broke up, even if it's what she wanted since he was very clingy.

The reason they're not lower on this list compared to the other couples I've already talked about? This. This right here:

I die laughing every time I watch this but it is 

freaking adorable of him to do

Sure, they may not be the most solid or compatible couple and Nick made Lindsay extremely uncomfortable most of the time but dammit, they were fucking hilarious to watch together.

Unpopular opinion time! You thought that was only reserved for the Worst list? Pffft! I can be just as unpopular with positive opinions too. Without further ado:

7) Seth and Anna - The OC

I will fight you Summer fans on this

Yep, you read that right. Seth and Anna. Hear me out. This show was another guilty pleasure of mine and I ate up the first season like my favourite ice cream until it went to absolute weird crap as a lot of too popular for their own good FOX shows do. I would giddily watch every week as new drama unfolded but the one thing I didn't eat up? Seth and Summer. I did not think those two made sense together. He worshipped her, she hated him and thought he was gross. Then suddenly, Anna enters the picture, this cool chick who gave great advice and actually had things in common with Seth, and suddenly Summer gets jealous and wants him? Uh-uh, not cool. Super lame.

I loathed Summer getting in between Seth and Anna because they were adorable together. They had great banter with each other and she genuinely liked him where Summer hated that she liked him but was hot so everyone wanted Seth to get with her. I never understood why people wanted that so much, I guess the "I hate/love you" thing is more popular than I thought but I just didn't feel it was there. I rooted for the girl that didn't have a hundred guys falling for her (it's implied Summer is extremely desirable), the girl who just wanted to be liked by the guy she liked, the girl who felt like a dork. She was sweet and her and Seth together were extremely sweet. I remember the backlash when they got together and being extremely confused by it. People claimed that Seth and Anna together were gross because they were more like brother and sister. I don't know what kind of warped relationships people are having with their siblings but Seth and Anna did not at all read like siblings to me. If you go by looks, Seth and Summer looked more like they were related to me. Whatever.

The reason these two are not higher, well, I have my top three firmly in place for one, but also? Seth turned into a massive dickhole when he dumped Anna for Summer but then acted like he could still have them both. I became very anti-Seth come the end of the first season and well, pretty much the rest of the series too.

And still, when he took her for granted, she offered him advice and
encouragement, even if it hurt her to do so. #teamannaforever

Side Note: Does anyone else find it annoying when shows bring up or echo comments made by fans? I've really ever only found this in FOX shows, The OC and Glee being the worst offenders that I've noticed. Like in The OC where Summer makes a comment about Seth and Anna being like brother and sister, I groaned because that's what the fans who wanted Seth and Summer together were saying and it didn't mesh with the show at all. It feels like it's just pandering to popular opinions and pulls me right out of the story. Writers/Producers, stop doing this. Just tell the story you want to tell and let people discuss it however they want. Don't change things up just because a few vocal people are crying for it.

6) Sean and Tamira - Breaker High

Baby Ryan Gosling! How could I not?

Shut up, yes I watched this show! It was awesome. Ok, maybe it wasn't awesome but I enjoyed it and the relationship I enjoyed the most on the show was Sean and Tamira's. Yeah, my crush on Ryan Gosling was not born out of The Notebook (which I'm fully aware is shit but it's a guilty pleasure of mine, that probably only is because of Ryan Gosling being in it), it was born when I was just a teen and watching him on this show.

What I loved about them was just how compatible they were. They were both slightly goofy and dorky and incredibly sweet. What's more is the fact that they do anything for each other. I recall an episode where Tamira didn't have enough money to stay on the boat and so Sean, who had just made a lot of money on one of his schemes, gave it all to her just so she could stay.

Picnic on a boat motherfuckers!

The episode I remember most is the one where they first got together because it was set in Canada which is where I'm from and they flipped around the usual American jokes about Canada. This was probably because while the show pretended it was about American characters, the show was filmed in Canada and had mostly Canadian actors but I still loved it. Anyway, the episode in question has Sean wanting to fulfill a bucket list he'd created and was determined to finish it all off before...I think it was his birthday? Anyway, one of the items was to kiss a girl and the whole episode, he's kind of flirting with this other girl but you can tell he's more in to Tamira and she likes him. Tamira is all hurt because she thinks he's kissed the French Canadian girl he was flirting with before but he reveals that he didn't because the person he really wanted to kiss was her. And then teen me swooned forever and pledged my undying love to Ryan Gosling. Not even joking, it was that scene that fully got me.

Not gonna lie, I still squee like a little girl when I watch this scene.

While the show is cheesy as hell, this couple will always have a place in my heart because, if I'm being completely honest, I identified the most with Tamira because I was never the girl that guys fell all over so I was ecstatic that she got a guy and he genuinely wanted her.

And now, my top five teen couples:

5) Lloyd and Diane - Say Anything

To know Lloyd Dobler is to love him and boy,
do I know Lloyd

Of course these two were going to be on my list. They are awesome, more specifically Lloyd is but that's because I'm a girl and I was more focused on my crush on him. Diane has her good points too. What I liked about Say Anything was that it felt insanely real, like you were watching the natural progression of a real relationship. Lloyd has a huge crush on Diane and is really sweet about asking her out, remember when you had to call someone's house and risk having to talk to their parents first to ask them out? Yeah, that sucked and this movie captured that young nervous energy perfectly. But enough about the movie, the couple is what we're here for.

Lloyd has become extremely popular lately as the ideal romanticized guy and with good reason. He's charming and likable, he considers the girl's feelings, and when he's asked to stay away, much as it hurts him, he does. He's very into Diane and is drawn to her but the important thing to note is that he also respects the hell out of her. He knows she's smart and has way more ambition than he does and he never tries to discourage her from that, he's always 100% supportive and wants her to go and follow her dreams. While he does watch over her, he never tries to control her, he simply lets her go off and mingle at the party to her heart's content but just makes sure that he knows she's ok and makes sure that there is no one hassling her. Ladies, that's called respectful protection and we need to start placing more importance on that and less on the "I must control your every move and prevent you from going anywhere without me...also no other guys can even talk to you" protection. *cough*fuckChristianGrey*cough*

Then there is Diane. She is smart and ambitious but is also a little sad that she may have missed out on experiencing the social aspect of high school, since she was so focused on her studies. Enter Lloyd, who she's not sure about but is intrigued by. She's a bit closeted but is very caring and sweet. The thing that I liked most about her? How open she was about sex. It would have been so easy for this movie to go the route of Lloyd pushing her for sex because he really wanted her but this movie surprised me by making him wait and not pressure her but then she "jumped him anyway."

This scene, short as it was, was hot

She wanted him, she wanted sex and she chose it. It's very rare that you see a movie where a girl takes an active role in her sexuality and I think that is the reason this movie has always stuck with me and why I love this couple. He respected her, she respected him and the sex came naturally. I love that and I love these two.

Side note: Fifty Shades of Grey is being released today or has been released. Don't go see that, it does everything wrong in a romance. If you want to see a true romance unfold, if you want to see a guy genuinely love and respect a girl, if you want to see a girl who actually is smart and ambitious, stay home and watch Say Anything. You won't be disappointed.

4) Willow and Oz/Tara - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Pretty much my thoughts exactly, minus the
personal sexual orientation thing.

This might be cheating but I don't care, I'm doing it anyway. I loved both couples. Willow's relationships (early on) were the best done relationships on the show. I love her with Oz because he was the first one to like her for who she was. On top of that, he was just damn smart about relationships. When Willow was trying to kiss him because she was mad that Xander and Cordelia were dating, he stopped her and told her that he wanted to kiss her more than anything but he wanted to kiss her when she wanted to kiss him, not to make someone else jealous. I loved that, it was honest, it was open and I think it's what really won Willow over with him. It won me over too, though I did like him before. Did I mention that I'm a sucker for slightly dorky girls finally being noticed by a guy who is really into her? I think that's becoming obvious with my pattern of couples so far but I don't care. I love how close they were and I love how much they cared about each other. I love that Willow also got a chance to show how much she loved him too when she found out he was a werewolf and stood by him. That is commitment.

Aren't they cute?

Alas, they didn't last, more because Seth Green wanted to leave the show but also because of nasty, gross Veruca (not that she made him cheat, Oz was an asshole for that). But from their break up came a new and very different relationship for Willow and that was with Tara. I will fully admit that teen me was not on board with the rumour that Joss wanted to make Willow gay. It confused me, it didn't seem true to her character, etc, etc, etc. But wow did this relationship win me over. From season 4 to 5 I just adored this couple. They clicked more than Oz and Willow did sometimes and the way they grew together was just fun to watch. Willow became more comfortable with herself and more skilled with her magic, Tara became less shy and stutter-y. They both benefitted from this relationship and they both would do anything for each other. Tara defends Willow's abilities and Willow will hurt anyone that tries to hurt Tara. It was sweet and it was genuine and we shall all agree to forget that season 6 happened. Yes?

Season 6 what?

3) Gib and Alison - The Sure Thing

What? Young John Cusack is adorable

Yep, another John Cusack movie and I'm not even sorry. I adore this movie and it's not that it's anything mind-bending or original but it has heart and a realness to it that I love. I don't think this was the original road trip to love movie but it was definitely one of the best ones and it's because the couple are a lot of fun to watch.

Gib is a bit of a slacker but he's not stupid, I mean he is in college...flunking English supposedly but he did get in and at least wanted to try to do well in school. While he might do stupid things, he's really a genuinely nice guy (not a Nice Guy) but a guy who would hold the door open for you because he wants to, a guy that would take the time to show you how to shotgun a beer, and a guy that would act like a complete lunatic to save you from a rapist. Alison is a bit up tight, studious, and practical but she's not unkind and the best thing about this movie is watching her loosen up when she's with Gib. Sure, they bicker but they also get along and even when Alison has the chance to get on a bus to get to California quickly, she opts instead to stay with and help Gib get there since he didn't have the money.

Not to mention, they have great chemistry together both when they're bickering and when they are getting along which is hard to pull off successfully. Basically, I just like everything about this couple and I never get tired of watching them go from acquaintances to enemies to friends and finally to lovers. It is funny, it is genuine, and it is romantic.

Lloyd is great but Gib just seems so much more fun and relaxed

This is another one to watch instead of that other horrid thing in theatres right now. Actually, this entire list could be retitled Better Things to Watch on Valentine's Day than Fifty Shades of Shit.

2) Pacey and Joey - Dawson's Creek

Joey made the right choice with Pacey

Are any of you surprised that they are on my list? Of course they are. I debated putting Pacey and Andie on my list also but while I did like them I was ultimately a Pacey and Joey shipper from the first season on. They said it would never happen, they were wrong!

So, why do I like Pacey and Joey so much when I hated Joey and Dawson. Well, for starters, Pacey is an awesome and interesting character while Dawson is an asshat of epic proportions. Also, Joey is rather unlikable for the most part, except for when she's with Pacey. I like the idea that you become a better person with the person you are meant to be with and whether the writers intended to or not (probably not because let's face it, the DC writers were not very good) they really showed that well with these two.

I think I explained my reasoning for starting my ship of them in my recap of the episode Double Date. Pacey seemed to genuinely like Joey and thought she was pretty because my god, she totally was! Dawson meanwhile, kept her firmly in the friendzone (thinking it was incest to date her because they were like brother and sister and that was the character saying that genuinely not the fans saying it) and didn't notice her at all until she put make up and a dress on. We all know how much I dislike that trope, (again, looking at you, She's All That).

Seriously, these two are just perfect

Not only that, they both just seemed to need each other and seek comfort in each other. Most importantly, they understood each other and where they were coming from. It's kind of funny to me that while the show threw around the words "soul mate" about Dawson and Joey, the ones I found to be shown to be soul mates were really Joey and Pacey (and Jen and Jack but I digress). Think about it, they both come from poorer backgrounds, they both had hard lives and were the subject of town gossip, so they understand what the other is going through on a very empathetic level. Where Andie wanted Pacey to change, Joey seems more content with Pacey the way he is. While Dawson was, I don't want to say outright not supportive but we'll say clueless about Joey's art, Pacey was encouraging and pushing her to do it because it made her happy.

On top of this, they have just an insane amount of chemistry together and numerous adorable moments together. The writers made the best decision putting these two together because theirs was the true best love story in the show. Period. End of sentence.

Now, who the hell is my number 1 if it isn't Joey and Pacey? Well, let's find out, shall we?

1) Jane and Adam - Joan of Arcadia

I adore this couple and I will adore them forever

I was shocked at how much I liked this show. I avoided it like the plague before because I thought it was going to be another 7th Heaven type of super religious family crap show. It is close but done so much better and smarter. The show follows the Girardi clan as they move to Arcadia where the father, Will, has become the new police chief, the oldest son, Kevin, has been left paraplegic after a car accident, Joan worries that she's crazy, the youngest son, Luke, feels ignored, and the mother, Helen questions her faith after having almost lost her son in a car accident. Now the interesting thing is that the family is not religious, in fact, Will Girardi is vehemently anti-religious, which makes Helen nervous about telling him that she wants to explore her spirituality. There's some very heavy concepts dealt with in this show, including the question of whether or not Joan is actually talking to God and what it means. It's insanely well-written and I encourage you all to at least give it a shot, it may surprise you as it did me.

That out of the way, on to the more pressing matter. I'm sure you guys who haven't seen the show, are sitting there and thinking: Why did you write her name Jane in the title? Are you high, Blinvy? The answer is, of course I am but I'm still not crazy. I can explain.

See?

Ok, I'll explain a little further. Adam starts out as kind of a space case, everyone mistakenly thinks he's a pot head, actually. He mixes Joan's name up, either by accident because he was truly spaced out or on purpose as the end of his first episode would lead you to believe, because he wanted people to leave him alone. I think it was a little of both, personally but what started out as a slip up, morphed into this absolutely adorable pet name between them. Joan got so used to him calling her Jane that any time he calls her Joan, she knows he's upset. That's how awesome this couple is.

This is one of those things where you accidentally catch lightning in a bottle, and by that I mean that Adam was only ever planned to be in one episode of the series. He was just a one off character that Joan helped out because of her gift of talking to God. And that would have been it, I'm convinced, if any other actor had taken the role. As it was the role went to Chris Marquette and the chemistry he has with Amber Tamblyn is just wonderful to watch. You believe that their characters are drawn to each other. Because of this, the writers got the idea to keep Adam on as a character and seamlessly grew their relationship from there.

I had an easy time picturing them as a real couple. These two were
great at just ad-libbing these cute little moments together

What I also like about these characters is that they actually felt like real teens. Joan could be completely bratty sometimes and Adam was oblivious sometimes but they both tried to be supportive of one another despite whatever was going on. When Joan took up cheerleading out of the blue, Adam was fully supportive (not for the usual teen guy reason...not entirely), he was for it because Joan wanted to do it and he wanted her to be happy.

Is this not just the cutest thing?

When Adam was spiralling downward, Joan took notice and despite him being mad at her, she still sought him out and asked him if he was ok. What I like the most about them is that even though they do misunderstand each other sometimes, instead of making crap up or talking in circles, they flat out ask each other what is wrong and they talk about it and move forward. I never felt like they were going one step forward and then two steps back to draw out some "will they/won't they" drama. It felt natural. Even when they kissed and Joan got scared and backed off, felt natural for her character who is a bit of an emotional wreck. They still remained friends, Adam moved on and started dating someone else, instead of being a Nice Guy Friendzone whiner, until they eventually couldn't deny their feelings for each other anymore.

How she even put off dating him is a mystery to me

There is something about these two where I could watch them be together for hours and not get bored. I never felt more strongly about a couple being together than with these two and Pacey and Joey. But these two pulled me in just a bit more and I was legitimately devastated when the show broke them up. Yes, I said the show did because in real life (yes I'm talking about these characters in the context of real life, shut up!) they wouldn't have broken up, of this I am convinced. The show's producers, the networks producers, I'm unsure, decided that Adam and Joan were getting to be like "an old married couple" and wanted them broken up. Supposedly both Chris and Amber protested this decision (and rightly so since really, the show didn't focus that much on their relationship to justify this decision) but they went forward anyway. I think Chris eventually agreed to the break up but argued about the why because yeah, that was some character assassination they pulled there. They made him cheat, of course, it's the stand by reason writers love to use for a couple to break up and is honestly getting more boring to me than a relationship actually lasting. But, it wouldn't have been so bad, I might have been able to stomach it, if they hadn't made his character so cruel about it. You just end up feeling bad for the girl he cheated with, he's awful to her. The whole thing left a sour taste in my mouth and it was only mildly redeemed by the fact that Amber and Chris are great actors and absolutely nailed the scene where Joan finds out he cheated. It's great...it was just a let down that they had to break up that way.

Jeez, could I have picked a more downer way to end this list? Sorry about that, I'm still bitter on this one because I love this couple so much. Even after the break up, it is shown that they still care about each other and I have no doubt that if the show continued, they would have at least mended their friendship and perhaps found their way to each other again. In my head cannon, they did but in my heart of hearts, the cheating never happened because there is just no way that Adam cheated on Joan. They are too adorable together. So let's leave this list on a positive note, shall we?

There. Much better.

Basically, Jane and Adam are my number one favourite teen couple for life. I have never seen a teen couple dealt with so realistically, so naturally, and just so sweetly as these two. They are the best.

Indeed, Adam, indeed

And that concludes my Top Ten Best Teen Couples. I defy you to not be able to find at least one couple on this list that you like and if you seriously dislike all of these then it is my opinion that you have no soul and I bid you good day, sirs. Kidding aside, let me know what you think of the list and who your favourite teen couples are. I actually learned something about myself, writing this list.  I'd never much considered myself as having a clearly defined type, for some reason I just didn't think about it but after writing this, I think it's pretty damn obvious that I do and I wonder how I never noticed this before. With the exception of Tara and Sean who are both blonde and one is a girl and I guess Nick who is more light brown, there is a very noticeable constant on this list, the dark haired goofy type. Yep, I am definitely a sucker for dark haired guys, especially if they are fun and goofy. It is no surprise at all to me that I ended up marrying a dark haired, goofy type. The more you know.

I hope you enjoyed reading and that you all have a fun Valentine's Day, whatever you happen to do with it.

Top Ten Worst Teen Couples

So, with Valentine's Day fast approaching, I thought it would be fun to share a list of my favourite and least favourite teen couples, starting with the worst. I'm going to stress that I have not gone out in search of general consensus and opinions on this matter, this list is purely my tastes and opinions. I cannot speak for everyone's nostalgic teen experiences with couples they looked up to, only mine. I find it's more interesting to learn how other people viewed things rather than just reading the standard doting praise on the usual top couples.

I'm also going to warn you all ahead of time that this list will piss a lot of people off because I have some people's favourite couples, some very popular favourite couples on this list, but I remind you again that this is simply a list of my personal least favourites and I will explain why. Also:

Please?

If you have a differing opinion, which I'm sure a lot of people will, please do feel free to share it and explain why they are your favourite or maybe even offer a few of your least favourites on here. I love hearing different opinions, all I ask is that you do it respectfully and that no one name calls or gets personal. Though the people that do comment are super cool so I probably don't have to worry. With all this in mind I present to you first, my Top Ten Worst Teen Couples:

10. Harvey and Sabrina - Sabrina the Teenage Witch

They certainly do look cute together though

Now this one actually surprised me. I was all set to put them on my Top Ten Best list based on pure nostalgia alone. They were going to be low on that list because they were never my extremely favourite, I just remember swooning over them when I watched the show way back on ABC's TGIF and remembered wanting them to get together. Then I got the urge to do a re-watch of the series and....they did not hold up for me. Their will they won't they was very sloppily done. There were episodes where it seemed like they were dating anyway but then the next they were going on about how they couldn't tell each other they liked the other and you just wonder why it was so hard when they were basically dating anyway. Not to mention, I found Harvey to be such a non-character. He was basically just there to be "cute guy that likes Sabrina" and wasn't really a fully developed character in his own right. On top of that, when they did start dating, he really didn't stand up for Sabrina a lot. Her nemesis, Libby was continuously insulting her in front of Harvey and then Harvey would stupidly say how nice Libby was.

Duh...Libby's always nice to me

Or he wouldn't clue in that Libby obviously liked him and stand his ground that he was dating Sabrina. A person can't be stolen, they have to want to cheat to cheat but I completely believe that Harvey was stupid enough to just go with whatever girl gave him attention that week. To be fair, at about the third season, I think it was, he finally did take a stand with Libby and tell her off because he was dating Sabrina but it felt like too little too late. It was enough to keep them from being higher on this list but not enough to save them completely from the worst list. Especially since the show's worst offence was the fact that when they actually started to give him a personality, and make him seem interesting, they wrote him out of the show. Boo-urns Sabrina the Teenage Witch, boo-urns.

Minor, minor points for having them end up together, even if they only
brought Harvey back for like the last 10 seconds of the series finale. 

9. Nicole and Carlos - Crazy/Beautiful

Anyone remember this one? Anyone?

I'm the type of person that actually really does enjoy watching bad movies because I usually find them somewhat enjoyable at what they fail to do or because there is a performance that is funny. The one thing I find unforgivable in a bad movie is being utterly and completely boring. That was this movie. The characters were completely uninteresting to me, and absolutely lacked energy and chemistry. Not to mention the entire movie felt so fucking long. I swear I actually fell asleep for a bit in the movie and then woke up and was angered to find that it was still going. I might have only passed out for 10 seconds but it sure made the movie feel like it lasted an eternity. I don't know, I just did not care for the plot and I did not care if these two got together or not. I also remember next to nothing about the plot and I'm going to flat out admit that I refused to re-watch this one to even find out if my opinion was still the same or not. From what I remember, it was your basic straight laced guy meets a manic pixie dream girl who shows him how to live and have fun (and also fucks up his life a bit but who cares because lurve! Amirite?). Boring, boring, boring and did I mention boring? Because that's really all I've got to say about this couple. They are saved from being higher on this list simply for being forgettable (themselves and the movie, not my experience at being completely, mind-numbingly bored). Next.

8. Liz and Max - Roswell

Horny yet?

This is not even close to the most unpopular opinion on this list but I'm sure it's up there. I enjoy Roswell and I like the characters Liz and Max, in theory. They are definitely more engaging than say Bella and Edward but they still fall into the category of being almost too in love with their love and angst. I find couples that are just so in love with themselves to be kind of annoying and while Liz and Max are not even close to the worst offenders on this list, they still have their moments. I also felt like sometimes they were a bit hypocritical. For instance, they were completely attracted to each other and for a while, thought they were being oh so noble by staying apart because of some unknown danger or whatever and that was fine for them to choose that. Where they lost me was the minute they started criticizing Michael and Maria for getting together while they themselves were kind of getting together. No, sorry, no but I dislike couples that judge other people for doing exactly what they themselves do because it's only special when they do it. Not cool. So, I feel they earned their spot on this list for being self-involved and full of themselves. Sorry, Max and Liz fans.

7) Xander and Cordelia - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

I'm in the, I'm learning, small minority that actually likes Xander...most of the time. I also like Cordelia. I absolutely did not like these two together. While I do get the appeal of the hate/love trope and it can work in some instances, I just felt that these two were a little too much on the hate side for me to buy them actually wanting to be together, especially Xander. I'm not going to say they were completely awful together, they had their moments it's just that their bad moments were pretty mean spirited. One example of this would be in the episode Bad Eggs in a scene where the two are making out in a closet:

Xander: You know what? This would work a lot better for me if you didn't talk.
Cordelia: Well, it'd work a lot better for me with the lights off.

I don't know, maybe some people found them on equal footing, maybe they enjoyed their banter, or maybe they just ignored it and found their jabs funny without caring about the relationship part. I happened to find the lines like the ones above just a little harsh and made me uncomfortable. They get some better scenes and better development where they both soften a bit, especially after it is exposed that they are dating but I still couldn't quite shake the meanness these two slung at each other in earlier episodes especially the stuff Xander was slinging her way. I believe at one point he told her that he needed her help but that she had to put on something trashy...er. What the hell? If a guy I liked insinuated that he thought I dressed trashy he would have gotten his ass kicked to the curb. Some of their banter was fun and some of their moments cute, but their meanness just kind of left a bad taste in my mouth. I just expect a little better out of this show, which I adore.

Yes, please stay away from her
(image from Fanpop)

Dishonourable mention: Willow and Xander

These two didn't last long but man was it uncomfortable when they were together. I just didn't like them together, it seemed awkward and forced and worst offence of all, it happened at the expense of hurting Willow's relationship with Oz. You don't mess with Oz.

Great friends just no on the romantic side for me

Now to continue with the list:

6) Laney and Zack - She's All That

Only likes her when she changes for him

When I first watched the movie, I actually enjoyed it and when I watch it now, I still enjoy it if just to laugh at its silliness and my own silliness for swooning for it. That being said, I actually really don't like these two. Cinderella stories are all the rage, I know but I'm kind of in Joey's camp (see Dawson's Creek - Beauty Contest episode) on this and that's "if you couldn't see my worth until I put on makeup and a fancy dress, I kind of don't think you see my worth at all" Laney was a pretty girl, maybe not jaw droopingly gorgeous but she was not the hideous monster that the movie and let's face it, even Zack, tried to make her out to be.

So, strike one Zack writes her off because she doesn't wear heels and wears her hair a way that he deems awful. Strike two, he pressures her into wearing contacts when she clearly tells him that they irritate her (the movie kind of forgets this as she never goes back to wearing her glasses anyway) but still, in his eyes, she wasn't good enough for him because she was born with bad eyesight, a thing that she can't control, (and as a glasses wearer, seriously fuck you, Zack). Strike three, he kind of tries to make his friend out to be the villain just because he told Laney about their bet but Zack is actually worse because he's the one that came up with the idea for the bet in the first place and he mocked her behind her back too. He was no angel.

I was honestly kind of happy that she decided to go to the dance with Paul Walker's character, Dean, instead of Zack. Yeah, he was bragging about getting to have sex with her but I didn't get the impression that he was going to rape her or anything. So ultimately, it was her choice. She could refuse to go to the hotel room he got or she could choose to have sex with him. I disliked that Zack turned it into this "I have to save her virtue" thing because he thought she'd be "tricked" into it. It was especially hypocritical of him as he also tricked Laney. So yeah, I didn't really buy these two together or why Laney would ever forgive him and still want to be with him. The story just doesn't work as a romance where the leads end up together, Pygmalion had it right.

And now...the Top Five Worst Couples are...

5) Ryan and Marissa - The O.C.

They were pretty together...pretty awful

Oh my god, these two are awful! I adored this show when it first aired, I loved how over the top and cheesy it was and I actually somewhat liked Ryan and Marissa's tumultuous love affair at first. I think that was mainly due to Ryan and me just wanting to see him succeed because of his back story (not really for any character or emotion Ryan shows because Ben Mckenzie is just...kind of Kristen Stewart-y in that regard). The next time I watched it, I just couldn't understand what the heck Ryan saw in Marissa other than she was pretty. She is whiny, selfish, annoying, stupid, basic, and did I mention selfish yet? Because yeah, she totally is. I think I loathed her from the moment they got back from Tijuana and she jeopardized his future by begging him to skip out on his entrance exam to get into a prestigious school. Ryan was smart, he finally had a chance at bettering his life as he was coming from the slums and a criminal past but no Marissa and her whiny pants was sad because her mother was being mean to her so he absolutely had to drop everything that second to come and help her. Yeah, no. She's awful. She also blatantly ignored Oliver being a dick to Ryan and just out and out being psycho because she's too stupid to live. I just, I got to a point where I just didn't ever want these two to get back together ever again.

The show apparently agreed with me and killed her off

4) Cory and Topanga - Boy Meets World

He looked like Screech. Why did she like him?

I wasn't ever really as enamoured with this show as everyone else was but I did watch it and got mild amusement from it. At first, I was pretty sold on Cory and Topanga getting together and I enjoyed watching but then the show started to pretend as if they were soulmates and while I don't mind the concept of soulmates, I think I've made it quite clear that I absolutely loathe being told that two characters are soulmates. Especially when it's just shorthand for "we're too lazy to develop this relationship into something believable so we're going to throw a big word at you and pretend like that explains why they belong together" and then never show us why they are soulmates. I then got even more nauseated by this couple when the show decided it would rewrite history and tell us that they had been going out since they were 3. Fucking 3!! How disturbed is that? I mean, firstly, it was quite clear in the first season that Cory and Topanga were not together and that he thought she was freaking weird and wanted really nothing to do with her. This only changed when they moved into junior high and he decided that she got hot. So, the writers were insulting my intelligence and memory at that point but secondly, it is just really weird to tell us that two 3 year olds knew about romance and wanted to be together forever. I don't know, I just don't find things like that cute or endearing and it certainly didn't sell me on them being soulmates for life. Just no.

Seriously, she was weird and he didn't like her.
Does no one remember this?

3) Bella and Edward - Twilight (and its sequels)

My god...your breath stinks!

I tried to keep this list mostly to things that I had watched when I was a teen but I just couldn't, in good conscience, leave these two off my worst of list. They are geared towards teens so I think they absolutely belong here and to be fair, I would have loathed them just as much when I was a teen as you will find out later on.

You've all heard the criticisms of this series ad nauseam by now but, let me assure you, they are all completely legit. We have a girl who is just the most depressing thing ever, who decides that she'd rather be young and pretty forever than be with any of her family or friends, decides that no one is good enough to hang out with once she meets Edward, and who plays two guys against each other. She's awful. Then there's Edward himself, who is attracted to Bella because she smells delicious to him. Her blood is his drug, as he himself even tells Bella numerous times. So, his attraction is born out of the fact that he wants to kill and eat Bella. Ok.... Not only this, he breaks into her house at night to watch her sleep and this is before he's actually talked to her or really befriended her which just ups the creep factor as if it wasn't already maxed out before. Then when they are in a relationship, he pretty much tries to control her every move under the guise of needing to keep her "protected". I could go on and on about how wrong these two are for each other, how selfish they both are and worst, what horrible role models they are for young and impressionable girls. They are terrible characters in a terrible story and I'm glad that Twilight's popularity has died off.

"I only like you because you smell good"
"Yeah, well I only like you because you're hot and you can make me young forever"

Ok, here's where I start to get a bit unpopular but to people who have been reading my blog for a while now, this next one shouldn't come as a shock.

2) Dawson and Joey - Dawson's Creek

These two should stay far away from each other

Come on, you knew they would be on here. I think I've covered extremely clearly in my recaps why I dislike this couple but I'll try to sum up my feelings here. Basically, these two characters are awful together. They are a classic case of the writers being lazy and just throwing the word "soulmate" at the audience to let us know that no matter how much they fight, they are still meant to be together but then they fail to give us a reason or show us why they should be together and instead just illustrate the many reasons they shouldn't be together.

My biggest gripe with this couple is how obvious it is that they can't last, their independent characterizations make it impossible for them to be together. Joey wants to get out of Capeside and explore the world, she's adventurous, she's excited at new possibilities and she's driven even if she's not quite sure what she wants to do with her life. Dawson wants to make movies and has a clear goal to get to Hollywood and become a filmmaker but at the same time, is way more comfortable being safe. There was that episode where they visited a college and I think the scene where they talk at the end pretty perfectly sums up why they are wrong for each other. While Dawson was frightened by the experience and felt better being at home, Joey felt awakened and excited.

Joey longs for adventure and to get out of Capeside, Dawson longs to make movies. You could argue that Hollywood is "out of Capeside" but I just doubt that the Joey Potter we got to know would be happy living amongst the "plastic" elite of Hollywood as Dawson's doting stay at home wife. Even if she found a job there, the vibe just wouldn't be Joey and Dawson would be away for long hours every day or hell for months in different locations depending on the shoot. I just don't think Joey would be happy with a life like that. Now this is me predicting their characters' future but even on the show when they were together, they didn't mesh for me.

For one, Joey gave up a paid semester to France for Dawson, that means she gave up a very important part of herself to stay with him and the minute you give up who you are to be with someone, that spells trouble for the relationship. Of course, I was right because pretty much every episode that chronicled their relationship from that point on had them fighting. Then the hilarious thing is that they both become better characters and better friends to others when they are not dating. Why should I buy that they are destined to be together again? Because when they are together, they fight all the time and ignore their friends? Sorry, I'm not buying this soulmate thing you're selling, writers.

Sobbing is not going to change my mind, Dawson

Ok, here's where I get really unpopular. I just want to remind everyone that this is my opinion only and you are absolutely free to disagree with it. Let's just all remember to be civil. Ok, so my pick for the number one Worst Teen Couple is....

1) Buffy and Angel - Buffy the Vampire Slayer

This one is going to get me killed, I know it

Yes, you read that right. Yes, I watched this show religiously when it first aired, season 1 right through to the end and I still love it to this day. Yes, I am telling the truth. No, I am not a Buffy/Spike shipper either but this is worst teen couple which is why I went with her teen years when deciding.

So, why do I hate this couple? Well, for starters, I just thought they were boring and Angel was just not appealing to me. Secondly, I watched this show because I loved the concept. I loved that there was this young girl who could kick monsters' butts. She was the hero, not the guy as was usually the case back then. I loved the horror elements, the action, the funny dialogue, the only thing I just wasn't that into with it were the romantic relationships. That just wasn't me and where I was the one who was gushing about how cool the monsters were or how awesome Buffy was at defeating them, everyone else was gushing over the most boring aspect of the show to me, Buffy and Angel. So, my disinterest just kind of grew to bitter resentment from there.

Also, he's a vampire and he's conditioned to kill. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's got a soul but for cripes sake, he killed a hell of a lot of people before that soul existed and fucking enjoyed it. I just don't buy the soul/no soul excuse as if he's a different person with or without one because you know what? Liam was a pretty horrible person too. I actually might have swallowed the soul/no soul thing better had he been shown to be a good guy before but that the demon soul took over and made him evil but, it didn't look that way to me at all. All I saw was an asshole guy given the gift of immortality and falling in love with the killing aspect so much that he enjoyed tormenting and torturing his victims before killing or turning them. I just....I couldn't be in love with someone who committed the atrocities that Angel did. Not to mention that the tragedy of their relationship was that they couldn't be together because if Angel experiences "true happiness" he will turn evil. Que? He was with Buffy a hell of a lot before and kissed her a lot...are you telling me that he is only happy with Buffy when he fucks her? Hot. Just being with Buffy doesn't make him happy, only sex does and that kind of always felt icky to me. Plus, I just always found it creepy that he was a 27 year old who was hanging around a sixteen year old girl and then making out with her, let alone a centuries old vampire. He was a creeper.

I probably wasn't supposed to cheer at this part, huh?
#sorrynotsorry

I don't get and have never gotten the appeal of vampires. Ok, I sort of got the appeal with Jerry Dandridge who was oddly arousing in Fright Night but I still wanted to see him defeated in the end. So, I do like them but I find them infinitely more appealing as villains. I mean, what future do you possibly have with a vampire? Nothing because either you grow old and die while they live or they kill you when you're still young and naive so that when you finally wake up and realize that you might not want to be undead and outlive all of your loved ones and have to drink blood and not experience the joys of food anymore, and possibly realize that perhaps, you do want children well, you're screwed. Actually, you're dead and there's no undoing that. The other option is that you stay together until you do grow and realize that you want more out of a relationship than staying out all night all the time and you break up with them. Ironically it was this thought that lead to me reading Twilight because someone told me that it explored those questions more deeply. Spoiler alert, it did not and I was pissed at that person for convincing me to read the first two books in that series before I rage quit.

Mayor: Yeah, and that's just one of the things you're going to have to deal with. You're immortal, she's not. It's not. I married my Edna May in ought-three and I was with her right until the end. Not a pretty picture. Wrinkled and senile and cursing me for my youth. Wasn't our happiest time. And let's not forget the fact that any moment of true happiness will turn you evil. I mean, come on. What kind of a life can you offer her? I don't see a lot of Sunday picnics in the offing. I see skulking in the shadows, hiding from the sun. She's a blossoming young girl and you want to keep her from the life she should have until it has passed her by. My God! I think that's a little selfish.

I may or may not have cheered for the Mayor when he made that speech too. Crazy or not, the dude was on point and I couldn't agree with him more. Buffy and Angel were doomed to failure. She may love him but they just weren't meant to be, in my opinion.

On top of these reasons, even if I buy into Angel being super good and not the same as Angelus at all or really the same as Liam, even still, I do not like them as a couple. This is my biggest reason. I love Buffy so much, she was a huge part of my teen years. I looked up to her and wanted to be her so much that I took karate lessons and actually earned my black belt (which is probably useless now that I've been out of training for over a decade...God, I'm old). The thing I admired about her was that she could handle things, she was the one who saved people, the world. Yet, when she and Angel got together she became just a bit less independent and a little more dependent on Angel to be there for her or sometimes even save her (she was worse for this with Spike which is why I hate her with Spike probably more than I do with Angel but again, teen couple). I hated that. I hated that she acted like she couldn't defend herself when he was around. She was the motherfucking slayer, she could handle her shit. They were also kind of mushy gushy and melodramatic about their love too. As evidenced in the episode Reptile Boy:

Buffy: When you kiss me, I wanna die!

I despise that line. It sounds like something that is more in place in Twilight than the smartly written Buffy but most of all I hate it because it felt like she was saying that she wants to give up being the slayer just to be with him and be a vampire and fuck that noise. I'm not behind this unhealthy attachment to a person thing where you'd give up everything you have in your life to be with them, everything that makes you, you. That's bullshit, it's weak, and it wasn't what I wanted to hear from Buffy. Anytime their scenes came on and they were discussing their relationship and whether or not they could do it, I basically felt like Xander in The Zeppo.

Yeah, can we not come back to that later? 

Because I'm not interested. #heartless

Well, that's my Top Ten Worst Teen Couples list. Who are your least favourite teen couples? Feel free to share and discuss. Stay tuned for the special Valentine's Day post that lists my personal Top Ten Best Teen Couples...unless I can't out run those nice people running towards me with torches and pitchforks.

Gotta go!

Dawson's Creek - 314 - Valentine's Day Massacre

Original air date: February 2, 2000

Welcome back to the recaps. When we last left off, Dawson had quit film class, Joey went on a date with college guy, Pacey acted in a play, and Jen avoided dating Henry. Let's find out what shenanigans the Creek gang get into this episode, shall we?

The episode opens with Dawson teaching Joey how to drive. Like most things, Dawson fails at it and for the second time in a recap, I have to tell a male character that they are no Lloyd Dobler.

Joey agrees

Pacey asks Joey if she's going on a date with AJ for Valentine's but apparently he's too busy with mid-terms. Pacey gets offended by the notion that AJ would rather do school work than take Joey out for Valentine's but Joey claims that she's fine with it as AJ is dedicated to his studies. Dawson and Pacey then invite Joey to the party they are going to which is hosted by Matt Caulfield. I love how they say his name like we're supposed to give a shit who this is. He's never been mentioned before now but apparently he's a douche because Joey expresses disgust that they are choosing to go to a "Matt Caulfield Party." Of course, Joey hates most things so...not sure how much that says about it. She and Pacey bicker over whether or not Dawson should go, as if he's their child which makes me laugh. Joey ultimately decides not to join them.

At school, Pacey and Dawson are looking over at the supposedly infamous Matt Caulfield who, urban legend has it, slept with six cheerleaders in one weekend.

Uh oh, he likes sex so he must be evil!

Dawson waffles a bit about whether he wants to go to the party after all but Pacey convinces him to take a chance and just go. Jack comes up to them and says that he didn't get the location to the party as it is completely confidential (how are people supposed to go then?) but he did get the password. Are you ready for what it is?

Because the Matrix was a big thing back then and therefore,
it must be referenced!

So, remember how last episode, Jen told Henry that she didn't want him to do anymore grand gestures? How she didn't need him to try so hard? Well, that apparently went in one ear and out the other because Henry is begging a blood bank nurse to take his blood even though he's already given lots and shouldn't give again for another 72 hours. He whines about how he has a date with an angel and how he worked at her favourite restaurant for two weeks to buy her dinner there, reserved the best table, and now wants to sell his blood so that he can buy her a gift. Look, Henry, it's sweet that you want to do all of this for Jen, it really is and I want to like you for it but dude, chill out. She's just a girl and she also asked you to stop doing shit like this because it makes her uncomfortable. Do yourself a favour and listen to her, for your own good and, you know, so you don't go into anemic shock. But if Henry actually listened to her, we wouldn't have a conflict for this episode and God knows this show needs more conflict.

More conflict, more! Get it all in there! As much as you possibly can!

Pacey, meanwhile, is talking to Doug about joining him for a ride along but Doug says that Pacey would be bored because all he is doing is casing the golf course in case there is a party being thrown there. Doug then asks if Pacey knows anything about a party and Pacey says he thought there would be a rager on Witch Island (SHOUT OUT TO WITCH ISLAND, THEY REMEMBERED IT EXISTED!). Then he walks away all pleased with himself but I'm not super clear on why. I mean, he thinks he's learned the location of the party but it's obvious that the cops are aware of it and are looking to shut it down. So, why does he want to go if the cops are just going to shut it down? Did he really think that Doug would take his word and only check out Witch Island and not the golf course that the citizen tip told him about? I guess so because Pacey walks away really pleased with himself for figuring out the location.

Andie informs Jack that her friend is coming to town to hang out with them. This friend is in fact, Jack's ex which makes him extremely upset and nervous about her arrival as his ex was a girl and he is now into boys. Andie tells him that it will be fine and all he has to do is tell her that he likes boys. Easy peasy, right?

Jen is getting ready for her date with Henry and is extremely nervous so Grams tries her best to calm her nerves. Jen, however, insists that she's not nervous at all, despite being obviously nervous. Hey, Jen, you're probably nervous because you know that you're going to end up being Henry's next victim.

Yes, I will continue beating this joke to death. He's creepy

Andie's friend, Kate, has arrived and is making small talk with Jack. She asks him if he has a special someone and Jack mentions that it's funny she should ask. Kate then bursts into tears and says that that is exactly what her ex said before he told her he was gay.

Womp-womp!

The gang meets up at the golf course and Andie introduces everyone to Kate. Kate then, extremely awkwardly tells everyone that she just broke up with her gay boyfriend and that she's super emotional because everyone just announces stuff like this. "Hey guys, I just want to let you know that I am extremely vulnerable right now, so please take advantage of me? Kay, thanks!" Guys really think girls talk like this, don't they? So, Pacey earns demerit points by telling Dawson to totally take advantage of this girl's emotional state and of course, this is where Joey shows up.

Pacey asks Joey what she's doing at the party that she intended to boycott (also, how the hell would she know where it is? They didn't think she was going so why would they have told her where to go?) and Joey tells him that she's there to make sure that Dawson doesn't go over to the dark side. Dawson pipes up and says that he can take care of himself. Sure you can, Dawson. Sure you can.

Jen opens her door to Henry who looks like he's about to keel over because of the lack of blood he has circulating his system. Jen doesn't know this but asks if he's alright to which he spouts some nonsense about being afraid to speak in case he wakes up to find that this is a dream. Jen assures him that this isn't a dream. and they head out. Henry presents her with a rose and tells her that he wants their night to be perfect. She pricks her finger and Henry freaks out.

Nah, not really but wouldn't that have been hilarious?

Jen says she's fine and insists it's just a flesh wound.

She said it, I couldn't not make this reference

The gang have paired off to drive around the golf course in search of the party, and of course Pacey and Joey are riding together, as it should be. Joey chastises Pacey for being obvious about pushing Dawson onto Kate. Pacey accuses her of being jealous but Joey claims she's just worried about Dawson. Pacey says he is too, which is why he's trying to get Dawson to let loose. Joey wants to know why having fun has to include going to parties and meeting new people. I don't know what to say to that.

Andie is paired with Jack and is trying to encourage him to tell Kate that he is gay. Jack doesn't want to because he doesn't want to give her a complex, since her last boyfriend was also gay. He says he doesn't want to hurt her all over again which is pretty reasonable but Andie scoffs at this and tells Jack to get over himself.

I don't know. I'm confused about this myself because she was
also freaking out about upsetting Kate not two seconds ago.

Kate is being a complete emotional wreck and basically the worst date ever as she goes on and on about her ex being gay and asks Dawson if he thinks she's beautiful. She also asks if there is anything wrong with her, since her ex called her an acquired taste. Girl, sounds like there was something seriously wrong with your ex. Who tells someone that? Then again, with the way she's acting right now...maybe the ex was right to say it? Because I have second hand embarrassment for how annoying she's being.

The gang meet up and they tell us that the party is straight ahead. So...why the need to split up? Oh, right. Conflict. They head over and the eponymous Matt Caulfield himself greets them. He asks why they are there if they didn't get an invite but before they can scamper off with their tails between their legs, he throws them a bone and asks if they know the password. Dawson obliges by quoting Keanu and looks just about as bland saying it.

Uncanny. Dawson could be the next Neo

They are allowed into the party on one condition, they must all have a shot. I love how the show presents this as the most dangerous, serious thing that Matt could ask them to do. It's one shot, people, and you're acting like your trapped in Jonestown and he's telling you to drink the Kool-aid. They act like this is serious shit but Andie and Joey both turn the shots down and Matt is cool with it and lets them stay so, I don't see the big deal here. Joey freaks when Matt offers the drink to Dawson because it's "not him" to drink. Pacey rightfully tells her to mind her business and let Dawson make his own decisions. Dawson gets mad as Pacey and Joey bicker over whether or not Dawson should drink and he decides to take the shot. Good for you, Dawson. Even though the show would have you believe that this is serious business and that Dawson is now evil or less innocent or something bad.

You had ONE shot? How could you!?

Jen and Henry are at the restaurant and Jen nervously tries to make small talk while Henry pretends that he isn't about to faint due to lack of blood. Jen notices that Henry is out of it and asks if she's boring him but he claims he's just resting his eyes. Jen jokes that Henry should just feel free to rest his head on the table and go to sleep. Cue Henry passing out.

Joey is complaining about Pacey to Andie who just laughs her off and tells her that she sounds like she did before she started dating Pacey. Joey looks incredulous to the idea but we all know what's coming and we all know she's gonna love it. Just as I predicted, Doug is doing his patrol of the golf course and pulls them over.

Dawson nervously talks to Kate who proceeds to be even more annoying than she was before by repeating everything he says and then pointing out how annoying it is that she's doing it. Yes, Kate, you are annoying and you are making me very happy that you are just a one off character. Anyway, Dawson asks her to go for a walk with her and she agrees.

Yes, yes it is, Kate

As Henry is being wheeled to an ambulance he gives Jen the present he wanted to get her which is a Hungarian Red ring. Jen tries it on but it doesn't fit and Henry starts spazzing out about how he's ruined everything. It was all supposed to be perfect, dammit!

Blah! I'll donate your blood next time!

Dawson is trying to get with Kate because...hormones and she's pretty but certainly not for her personality. She continues to annoy the pants off me. He whines about the fact that she thinks he's a nice guy and she tells him that if he doesn't want to be a nice guy he should just stop talking about kissing her and just do it. Ugh. Just ugh with these two. Dawson gets all excited at the prospect that it is this easy and they go to kiss. Kate then pauses, politely tells him to hold the impulse, walks a little ways away, delicately bends over, and upchucks all over the ground. I've got to say, her body is very polite to her to give her so much warning. If I had been in her shoes, puke would have just shot out of my mouth and into Dawson's face...probably because Dawson was about to kiss me and not because I was drunk.

Sorry, Dawson. No girls want you

Jen complains to her Grams about how awful her date was but Grams just brushes off her concerns by saying that they'll have something to laugh about on their second date. I don't know, some dates can be so disastrous that you don't want a second date. I mean, how many times does Jen have to tell Henry not to try so hard before he'll get the point? I'd be a bit put off by his crazed ranting about how everything had to be perfect too because that's a lot of pressure to put on someone. Put yourself in Jen's shoes, would you enjoy a guy obsessing over how perfect everything had to be because you're just so perfect? Maybe the first time, maybe the second time, but then you start to feel like you have to make sure you keep being perfect for that person because they have put you up on this pedestal that is impossible for a regular person to live up to. I don't know, that doesn't sound fun to me. Grams suggests that maybe Henry did everything he did because he thought that's what she wanted him to be and Jen gets all ponderous. I call bullshit because she told him just last episode that he didn't have to try so hard and to stop doing grand gestures. Hang on, I'll even post the quote here. From Episode 313 - Northern Lights:

Jen: It's just that you've got to stop it with these grand gestures, these larger-than-life public declarations. I- You're like the Christo of teenage crushes.

Henry: Who's Christo?

Jen: He's kinda like a sculptor, he does these really large-- nevermind. It's just that you don't have to try so hard.

I've underlined the relevant text to point out the utter bullcrap the writers are trying to throw my way in regards to Henry and Jen's relationship. They keep trying to make out like Jen expects so much from Henry and poor innocent Henry just has to try so hard to get her attention but it's not her fault that he does these things. She has never asked him to, she has always plainly told him that she's not in to his over bearing crush on her and the fact that everyone is trying to make out like Jen isn't being clear with Henry or giving him enough of a chance is really grating on my nerves.

Meanwhile, Deputy Doug breaks up the rest of the party and finds Pacey hanging upside down, waiting for beer to be poured down his throat...or having just done it more probably as he doesn't clue in to the fact that everyone up and ran off and asks if he "did it wrong"

Through sheer contrivance, the only people Doug has managed to catch are the Creek gang. I'm not even sure how he caught Dawson and Kate who had walked away from the party but whatever, they are all here. Kate continues to annoy me by crowing on about how much fun this is and how totally not over her ex she is. Seriously guys, she's like so over him, for reals. Jack thinks that this is now the best opportunity to tell her his sexual orientation and she takes it...better than I thought she would. She comments that he was good at sex which he rightfully points out has no bearing on his sexual orientation and then she rounds on Dawson and asks if he's gay which is pretty hilarious.

Why do people keep asking me that? Is it because I have that framed
picture of Steven Spielberg next to my bed?

Kate asks if he's sure and then blurts out that apparently only gay guys will kiss her, even though she and Dawson didn't kiss because she was busy up chucking but really, she only said this so that Joey could then pick a fight with Dawson. Joey is incredulous that he kissed Kate, which makes Kate acknowledge that they didn't actually kiss because she vomited. Joey doesn't care and asks Dawson what the hell he was thinking. You know, if I were Kate, I'd probably despise Joey right about now. Like seriously, you be the girl that a guy tried to kiss and then listen to another chick question the guy's judgement because of it. Not cool. As annoying as Kate was, I still kind of felt bad for her in that moment.

Joey and Dawson argue until Pacey calls them out for being annoying (preach), then Joey and Pacey argue and Joey gets upset over how mean Pacey is being. The argument between Pacey and Joey is so much better because there feels like there is actual weight there. Joey actually looks hurt at the things Pacey says and while Pacey is frustrated, he also feels bad about hurting her but then can't seem to stop. He then says this:

Pacey: You didn’t do anything to deserve this. The drunken lout in the corner just pleads sheer frustration. I mean, honestly, do you have any idea how exhausting it is to exist on your periphery? To witness this perpetual dance that you two have – one week you’re soul mates, the next week you’re giving each other up for the greater good. I mean, do you think it’s possible that sometime soon you could make up your mind? Please? And the reverence that you two treat this little saga of yours with, is enough to make a guy wanna puke.

Have I mentioned how much I love Pacey? Because I do. He basically just vocalized how I feel about every couple on tv that goes on and on about how they're soul mates  while also having to break up constantly because reasons but they are still totally in lurve! Make up your damn minds! Anyway, Pacey of course pukes after saying puke because comedy or something.

I feel even worse for Pacey when Doug comes to let everyone out, except for him. Apparently, their father wants Pacey to stay in a cell all night as a punishment. Really? Mr. Witter was apparently very bitter that he lost that Worst Parent in Capeside award to Mr. McPhee. I could kind of see a parent making this decision if their child was constantly getting in trouble but from everything I've seen, Pacey is a pretty good kid. You don't let your kid languish in a jail cell all night for going to a stupid party.Or maybe I'm just naïve, I don't know, it just feels wrong.

I want to give him all the hugs!

Jen goes to the hospital and apologizes to Henry for not telling him that she was more nervous about the date than she let on which is just stupid because she shouldn't have to apologize. She tells him that she was nervous because back in New York, Valentine's was the day that the guys she was with would take out the girl they really liked and Henry interrupts that he doesn't believe that for a second which is just insulting. Dude, she's telling you something extremely painful, something that obviously hurt her, shut up and listen and stop making her out to be this perfect thing. She's a person, a person with experiences, who makes mistakes, and who has been hurt, way worse than you ever have so just shut up and stop trying to make her perfect because she's not. No one is. Accept her for who she is and then she can maybe start accepting you for who you are. End of. Although, she does say she wants to keep the ring he gave her so...I guess she likes some grand gestures.

Jack asks Kate if she's ok and she actually manages not to annoy me in this scene. She says that she's kind of cool with him being gay because it lets her off the hook because their relationship ending was not her fault and nothing either of them can change. And before you think she meant that it was Jack's fault for being gay, she quickly tells him that he isn't to blame either. He says he knows and she asks if he does know because he seemed ashamed to tell her he was gay. Jack admits that he didn't want to hurt her because when they were dating, something had always felt a bit off and that his feelings were wrong. He felt that he would be disappointing her by telling her that. Kate has this to say:

Kate: In a million years, you could never disappoint me, Jack. Gay or straight, you’re a world-class human being. That’s why I wanted to see you – you take me back to this nice, safe place, where crushes never end and hearts can’t be broken. And I needed that this weekend.

Thank you for leaving this show on a positive note, Kate because you've annoyed me from the first moment you called Jack, "Jackers." They hug and it's nice.

This next scene is between Dawson and Mitch and I have pretty much zero interest in it. Basically, Mitch is pissed because Dawson has been acting like a tool this season, wrecking his boat, throwing huge parties with strippers at their house, ending up in the police drunk tank, etc.. Dawson tries the idiotic excuse of "I'm young, I'm supposed to screw up." which is true, in a sense, but has gotten to the point of being an excuse to be the biggest assholes you can be just because you are young. That is wrong and I'm tired of people using age as an excuse to be a shitty human being. Being young and making mistakes is fine, when they're your mistakes and don't endanger anyone else. You can't do whatever the fuck you want, when you know the consequences (and don't tell me that kids, even those as young as 10, don't understand what is right and what is wrong), and then get out of trouble just because you are young. That is bullshit. Mitch agrees and tells Dawson that if he wants to start acting like a kid, then he will start acting like a parent. He punishes Dawson by requiring him to help out at the restaurant Gail bought every day after school and on weekends until he starts learning responsibility.

Sucks to be you

Back at the jail, Doug surprises me by clueing into the fact that Pacey is acting out because he's bothered by something and asks Pacey if he wants to talk about it. Pacey says he doesn't but then starts talking because he clearly needs someone to talk to and he can't talk to Dawson. The show means that it's because he has a crush on Dawson's ex but in my head cannon, it's because Pacey has finally realized that Dawson is a shitty friend, who is usually incapable of listening to anyone else's problems. Anyway, he tells Doug about the girl he likes, without saying it's Joey, and mentions that she gives him butterflies. Doug tells him to never lose the butterflies and says that's what sucks most about getting older.

To go off on a bit of a tangent, I don't think losing the butterflies is what sucks most about getting older, there's things like chores and bills and crap that rate worse for me, but I will admit that it does suck to lose that feeling. It's funny that the thought never crossed my mind until I saw this episode again and I realized that Doug is absolutely right. Somewhere along the line, you do lose that ability and it was just the best feeling when you looked at that right person and they made you so happy that you just got that fluttery feeling in your stomach. I was lucky enough to marry the last person that gave me those feelings and even though I am still attracted to him, I still love him, and he still makes me happy, I have not experienced the butterflies in a while. I think because with time, comes comfort and security and the butterflies come from a place of nervousness and the unknown. So, while I miss the feeling, it's not like good doesn't come from losing it so it definitely doesn't suck the most about getting older. But I digress...

Back to the prison. Doug asks Pacey what he's going to do about his crush and Pacey goes all doom and gloom about how it can never be. Doug tells Pacey that there aren't a lot of people in the world with the ability to give you butterflies (very true) and that Pacey should tell this person how they feels or he will regret it for the rest of his life. Pacey then thanks his brother for the advice.

It's super sweet and I didn't think the writers were capable of writing a
moment like this between the Witter brothers. It was a nice
break from all the tired gay jokes.

The next morning, Pacey goes straight to Joey's house to apologize to her about his behaviour. Joey admits that she was worried about him too. The look Pacey gets on his face when she admits this is the absolute cutest face. He then gets all ready to tell her that he likes her but backs out at the last second to tell her about what she's doing wrong with driving stick and I want to be angry at them prolonging this, I just can't because this is just the cutest thing ever. The way Joey just smiles at him and asks him if he wants to show her now, and then Pacey smiles and says "yes." Then they show them in her truck and he succeeds where Dawson failed to show her how to shift gears. Then she gets super excited about the fact that she succeeded and it's just all adorable and the ending to this episode has to be one of my favourites so far because they ended on this adorableness.

Awwww

Congrats Pacey. You are the only male on this show to earn the
Lloyd Dobbler Seal of Approval.

So that was Valentine's Day Massacre and I have no clue why it was called that as no one was killed in this episode, though I half expected Henry too when he was spazzing about everything having to be perfect. I'm also getting really pumped because we are getting so close to Pacey and Joey happening that I just can't even contain myself.

Pictured, Blinvy

Stay tuned for the next episode, Crime and Punishment in which Joey paints a mural that gets vandalized and Pacey seeks vengeance on the person responsible because he's awesome. Dawson does something too but who cares, it's Dawson.

The Glee Re-Watch begins...and other blog news

Alright, so I've been thinking as I am recapping Dawson's Creek and noticing all of it's flaws and perhaps, dated ideologies about love and women, and men, and gays, and...everything, that I would take a look at a current show and see how well it is dealing with many of the same issues but with a fresh perspective. Dawson's Creek aired 10 years ago so, how are we doing today? Have writers learned from past mistakes? Has continuity improved now that we've moved past the archaic and out-dated notion that you absolutely must be home at 7pm on a Tuesday night on the night that a new episode is airing and are able to view episodes whenever the fuck we feel like it?

Well, all that and more will be answered during the big Glee Re-Watch spectacular. I was going to get started straight away and just launch into the recaps but because I know I have certain feelings towards a character, I thought I should make this post to address the elephant in the room.

I need to, my house just isn't that big, guys

So, I am just going to come right out and say it. I don't really like Finn as a character. Actually, I liked him fine, in fact I liked all of the characters early on, flaws and all, but later on they all go through their periods of just being loathsome and I'm going to call them out on it. That being said, given the fact that the actor who played Finn tragically passed away before the end of the show I just wanted to stress that while I may say some negative things about Finn as a character, I do not mean any disrespect to Cory Monteith or his family in any way. So, regardless of how I feel about Finn, that does not reflect how I feel about Cory which is not really much of anything because I didn't know the guy. I'm sure that he was a very nice person though and again, I mean no disrespect when I criticize the show or the character he played.

With that out of the way, I can't wait to get started on the recapping goodness. I've already re-watched the pilot episode and my god, I almost cried because I forgot how great it was back then. It is such a different show now but I guess I'll get to that when I get to it.

In other news, the next Dawson recap is almost done and ready to be posted as well as some very special Valentine's posts that hopefully will just lead to fun discussions rather than my untimely death because lets just say, I've got some unpopular opinions. Stay tuned for my Top Ten Worst Couples and my Top Ten Best Couples which will be coming out next month. Until then, here is a cute and innocent kitteh:

Please don't kill me?