Wednesday, 16 January 2013

Dawson's Creek - 109 - Road Trip

Original air date: March 17, 1998

We are nine episodes into this season and I am getting more and more confident that every episode will begin in Dawson's room. I am not disappointed here and all I can think is that with three episodes left this season, they had better not disappoint me.

Or I'll mope like Dawson

Dawson is moping in his room while Joey complains that he's moping. It's apparently been two days since Jen dumped him and Dawson hasn't eaten and he constantly stares at Jen's house. Or maybe he leers at Jen's house. What did I tell you about that spelling of the name? Creepy.

Maybe she dumped you because you collect
creepy alien dolls? Seriously, fuck E.T.

Dawson whines that since she rejected him, she rejected romance, honesty and respect. Oh, did she, Dawson? Really? Because from what I remember, she dumped you because you were being a possessive jerk and she needed some time to herself. No boyfriends. Oh and also, respect? Don't make me laugh Dawson, you basically called her a slut on numerous occasions. In fact, you insinuated her sluttyness on the day she broke up with you, so you are not a champion of all things respectful, is what I'm saying.

She also rejected judgement, shaming,
and my goofy hairdo.

Anyway, Joey suggests they watch a movie because the conversation is getting too disturbing and I agree with her. It becomes more disturbing when we find out what tape is in the VCR:

See? What did I tell you guys? Wank material.

After the theme song finishes, we cut to Billy pulling a B&E in Jen's room. He waits on her bed for her when Grams walks in. I've got to hand it to Grams, if I turned around and saw some strange guy in my or my family's bed, I would straight up scream and run away. But not Grams.

Bitch, please. I've dealt with worse than you.

She's cool as a cucumber. I don't understand why she needs a serious talk with Jen though because when Jen comes in she is genuinely surprised he is there. Grams leaves them to talk warning Jen to get him out of the house or she will call the National Guard.

Jen asks Billy what he's doing there and he claims that he heard that she dumped Dawson and so he thought she would be looking for a replacement. Except she dumped you too, Billy. Or do you not remember? You know, you were packing up and congratulated Dawson on getting the girl or whatever. Who the hell did you hear it from anyway? The only person you know in Capeside is Jen. Whatever. Jen clarifies to him that just because she and Dawson broke up, does not mean she is looking for a new boyfriend.

Didn't I already dump you?

Dawson is on his way to school when he bumps into Billy. Billy starts talking about how they have common ground with them both having lost Jen and for some reason, Dawson listens. Billy then convinces Dawson to go to Providence with him so that they can pick up college girls at a bar where he knows the bouncer. Dawson agrees, because he hopes that it will make Jen wonder about him for a change.

Dawson the oblivious and gullible

Some high school jock named Warren pulls up next to Joey and tries to offer her a ride. Joey reacts with snark but eventually relents and accepts the offer. It takes about two seconds for the jock to be all creepy and ask her if she's cold or just happy to see him.

Hey, it's Jesse! Xander and Willow's
forgotten best friend.

Dawson walks into school and tells Pacey what he's up to. Pacey is very excited and says he's going to go too. Billy is OK with this and Dawson goes to hand in his math homework before they leave.

Way to hand in your math homework before
cutting class.

Jen and Joey are actually walking out from class together when they bump into Billy the kid. Billy tells them that he's taking Dawson and Pacey to a club he knows because Dawson was complaining about not getting any in Capeside. Joey asks him what kind of place he's talking about and Billy alludes to the fact that they are going to a whore house. He then pulls Pacey away with him as they go get Dawson. Pacey asks if they are really going to a whore house but Billy says he was joking.

Pacey's face when Billy says they are going
to a whore house is adorable.

Jen and Joey are aghast at their beloved Dawson daring to go to a whore house. Jen then tells Joey that she heard something about her that morning and asks if she slept with Warren. Joey answers with snark instead of just saying no and then asks why Jen would ask that. Jen says that Warren is telling everyone they did. Damn, that guy works fast. One ride together equals sex?

But, what about Dawson going to a whore house?

Joey confronts Warren in the lunch room. He tells her that this lie could help both of their reputations and Joey questions how exactly it would help hers. I have to agree, in what world does having sex equal a good reputation for girls? In my experience, in this sad world we live in, girls who have sex are automatically labelled sluts and ridiculed or seen as "easy". In other words, your logic does not resemble our, admittedly sad and outdated, Earth logic. Joey goes to walk away but Warren yells out that he never said he'd be her boyfriend and the whole cafeteria starts snickering at Joey. It's OK, Joey, Warren is eventually going to get captured and turned into a vampire and then staked by his best friend accidentally.

I might be getting my shows mixed up again...

Jen approaches Joey in the hallway and tries to comfort her by saying she didn't believe the rumour. Joey retorts that if she didn't believe it, she wouldn't have had to ask. Sort of true but I would still want to confirm it just in case it was true. It's better to hear it from the person that just assume, is all I'm saying. Jen tells Joey that she may have a way to get back at Warren. Yay, Jen and Joey bonding time.

Dawson and Pacey are on the ferry to Providence and Pacey is hammering home Dawson's "nice guy" image by saying that he doesn't need an "angel on his shoulder" because he has Dawson. Dawson tries to claim that being the angel doesn't work for him anymore. They bicker some more when Billy comes back saying that he doesn't like the look of two guys, who he's dubbed the "Deliverance Twins" on the boat. He points out that they are harassing everyone and Pacey asks if they should give them some instant karma. Billy suggests slashing their tires but Dawson claims that is unimaginative. He then proves his super imaginative and bad boy self by asking if they've seen American Graffiti. Yeah, you're super imaginative for doing exactly what you saw in a movie, Dawson.

Yeah, you guys should be more like Dawson and
copy things from other, better movies.
Joey is copying when Abby walks by and sees her. Yay! Abby returns. God I missed her. Anyway, she makes a comment about Joey and Warren and Joey promptly pretends to cry. Joey makes up some story about how Warren said they didn't need protection and that the pregnancy is her problem, not his. Abby gets super concerned and offended on Joey's behalf which, actually shows Abby to be pretty decent in my opinion. I mean, sure she was going into the copy room to ridicule Joey for having slept with Warren but the minute she found out that Joey was pregnant, she was all concern. I don't know, she just seems not that "evil" to me. She's just a bored girl who loves gossip.

Best side character on the show.
Side note here, I never understood how this was payback. Not then and not now because again, in this sad world we live in, I rarely saw the guys get any flack over getting a girl pregnant. Most of the stigma went towards the girl so Joey was inviting more scorn onto herself but this is fiction land and apparently teens are very concerned for the girls who get knocked up and very against the guys who try to deny they did the knocking because her plan works and Warren immediately has baby stuff put in his locker.

Who put all of that in there? The locker fairies?

Dawson hooks up the Deliverance Twins' bumper to the back of the ferry. When they are cleared to go, Pacey moons the guys as Billy hits the gas and speeds away, when the "Deliverance Twins" follow, their back end is ripped to shreds, courtesy of Dawson Leery. Now everyone will be leery of Dawson being near their cars.

I'm King of the World!

Once they are at the bar, Billy starts pressuring Dawson about locking down some babes already. Dawson can't fathom picking them out that fast but Pacey already has some locked down while playing pool because he's a BAMF.

Scoping the ladies while playing pool. What a player!
Meanwhile, Joey is confronted by the librarian, Mrs. Tringle from the detention episode. Hey, fun fact: Did you know that Katie Holmes starred in a movie called Teaching Mrs. Tingle? It popped into my head the moment she said the librarian's name and I thought it was a funny coincidence. Back on track, Mrs. Tringle wants to get Joey to join a family studies class to help her prepare for what's ahead. Joey replies with, what else? Snark and scorn. Ehhh, I'd watch out if I were you, Mrs. Tringle. This is what happened to the last teacher that crossed Joey:

Oh look, the side note paid off already.

Billy pressures Dawson to follow Pacey's lead and try and pick a girl up. Dawson goes over to a girl who is wearing a film threat shirt, hoping for ease of conversation through common ground, I guess. She doesn't react well to his "Hi, my, my name Dawson" line though. Shocking:

The sarcastic force is strong in this one
Pacey attempts to chat up a different girl and strikes out. It's too bad because "I'm the drummer from Pearl Jam" would have totally worked on me...if Joshua Jackson said it.

Pretty funny response though.

Dawson somehow wins the girl over with his ramblings and she offers him up a name, Nina. Pacey points Dawson out to Billy and comments on how the woman looks fine. Billy looks disappointed, so he's clearly up to something.

Nyah, my evil plan is failing. *twirl*
Next, Joey goes over to Jen's place and tells her that she wants to call off their...prank? I don't know what to call it and neither do they as Joey refers to it as a thing. I don't get what they were hoping to accomplish with this. People would have found out eventually that she wasn't pregnant and then Joey would be that crazy ass chick who lies about pregnancies to desperately win back the guy who slept with her. How would that be on her reputation? She'd be labelled a desperate loser who tries to ruin people's reputations and Warren would be back on top and sympathised with. This thing was never going to end well for Joey, why did they do this?

It's almost as incomprehensible as trying
to outrun the wind. Right Marky Mark?
Jen says that Warren deserves what he got because he didn't treat Joey with respect and she understands how that feels. Joey then lashes out at her claiming that Jen was just using her to get back at all the men who wronged her. That's not really fair, possibly true but come on, the dude was an asshat and he did deserve some retaliation, just not the retaliation you went with. Not because it was too mean but because it was dumb and really wouldn't work. She then starts accusing Jen of a bunch of stupid shit like this:

That's not even the worst part. She also tells Jen that Dawson was probably the only nice guy she ever dated but she fucked it up and drove Dawson into the arms of a prostitute.

Girl, you trippin'
What the hell, Joey? Why do you keep trying to make Jen the bad guy just because Dawson picked her over you to date? That's so not cool. Also, Jen was the only one willing to help you out with the whole Warren situation, your other friends were AWOL and everyone else in the school believed Warren. Her idea was stupid but at least she tried to be on your side. A part of me is really sad because it seemed like Jen really only had boyfriends and was craving a female friend and that she hoped if Dawson wasn't between them, they could be friends. Well, Joey shit all over that.

Shut up, Joey.
Jen puts Joey in her place though by saying that ever since she and Dawson broke up, Joey has been scared to death because now there are no more excuses and no one to blame but herself when Dawson treats her like "just one of the guys".

Go, Jen!

Dawson is talking to Nina about movies and someone finally calls him out for pretending to be into movies and yet his favourite director is Spielberg. No offence to Spielberg, his movies are fun but, with the exception of a few, they are nothing all that meaningful or deep like Dawson keeps pretending they are.

OK, so this scene represents the divide
between the social classes...
Thank you random bar girl who we will never see again. Dawson's rebuttal is probably the most overused and annoying come back in movie discussions, "his movies make billions at the box office." Mmm hmm, because the amount of money a movie makes is an accurate gauge of quality or a director's ability.

Just saying.
Nina calls him out on this too and I wonder if we're supposed to buy this as Dawson being super innocent and optimistic about film or just blatantly incompetent. Judging by the movies he will make through out this series, I'm going to go with incompetent.

Billy walks over to them and tries to pick up Nina, I guess to prove that he is better than Dawson. However, his charms don't work on secure, college girls and Nina asks Dawson if he wants to get out of the bar and away from Billy. Dawson happily agrees.

He and Nina talk as they walk to her car and Dawson let's slip that he just got dumped. Nina is not surprised by this and when Dawson explains the situation, she actually offers to let him come to her place to watch movies to help him impress his friend. Dawson turns her down because he still wants Jen back and doesn't think it would be right.

I'd stick with offended, because if Dawson is the guy that
restores women's faith in men, we're all doomed.

Back in Capeside Jen is approached by Abby who informs Jen that Joey is a desperate sophomore who made up a story about being pregnant in order to land a popular boyfriend. You see? I told you all that would happen!

I told you so, I told you so, I I I told you so!

Abby goes on to say that the reason she knows this is that she talked to a girl that used to date Warren who, I think, said that he was impotent or something. That's the only thing I can infer from "he has a soft spot for the ladies in a very unfortunate location." Jen runs over to tell Joey and they laugh about this. But...she's still the one who lied about being pregnant, you guys. Are we going to ignore this? OK then.

Victory? I guess.
I have to say one thing about this scene, while Abby does spread the gossip to Jen by accusing Joey of lying, it seemed from her reactions that she was on to them and quite happy to divulge the information to Jen in order for them to get back at Warren. She's really not that evil or mean, she looked genuinely happy as she watched Jen tell Joey about Warren's impotency. This is yet another reason Abby is awesome.
Back at the club, Dawson goes back in with Pacey and Billy. Billy makes fun of Dawson for still being at the bar and supposedly blowing it with Nina like he did with Jen. Dawson finally calls Billy out on his crap and that he doesn't want to be like Jen's loser ex-boyfriend. Billy then pulls a hissy fit and leaves them to find their way back to Capeside. Hopefully we never see him again.

That would have been the smart thing but
we're talking about Dawson Leery here.
Joey threatens Warren with her new found knowledge and makes him recant his lie about them sleeping together. He then stupidly still asks her out for a date which she rightfully rejects. The guys at Capeside are kind of overwhelmingly piggish, is this to make Dawson seem better by comparison? Like the only true "nice guy" of the school?

Joey then goes over to Jen's house with ice cream as a peace offering. They bond a bit over the cookie dough ice cream and Jen asks if they can keep Dawson from coming between them. Joey says she thinks so because he's only in love with one of them. Jen agrees but then hints that she thinks Dawson is in love with Joey and that she is just the object of his infatuations. They then express how grossed out they are at the idea of Dawson having sex...

So neither of them like him? Nah, I jest. I'd be grossed out if a guy I wanted to sleep with slept with a prostitute first too. Nothing against women of that profession, it's just your chances of catching an STI go way up. I've never gotten one and hope to keep it that way so if a guy I liked had done it, I would have crossed him off my list of suitable mates until he got checked out.

The next day, Dawson walks into his room because his parents didn't bother to check up on him or anything and finds Joey waiting for him. She tries to grill him about his time in Providence and if he's actually had sex but with vague questions to try and feign indifference. Dawson doesn't pick up on this and says there is so much he wants to tell her but that he's just too plum tired to talk at the moment and gets into bed so he can sleep. Joey says she's good with waiting to hear it but you can tell she's itching to know if he got it on with a prostitute. The end.

Wake the fuck up and tell me whether or not
you had sex with a prostitute already!
Will Billy's lie about them going to a whore house be revealed? I'm guessing they'll forget this little exchange even happened. Will Jen and Joey continue their friendship? Probably not. Was this episode a waste? Kind of. It really only served to show what a nice and honourable guy Dawson is and we already knew that. I guess we were supposed to wonder if he would succumb to temptation and be happy when he didn't but I think I would have respected him a lot more if he had gone to Nina's house. It was shown that she wasn't some floozy. They connected over their love of movies, they had something in common which is something he lacks with both Jen and Joey. He's just a kind of boring character who doesn't really take any risks. While most times I'm screaming at a character to not do something so stupid, I find myself screaming at Dawson to actually do something fun for once.

Well, that's it for this recap, next episode is Double Date. Another one of my favourites this season because of a certain pairing being realised in it. Stay tuned.


  1. "In other words, your logic does not resemble our, admittedly sad and outdated, Earth logic."

    Cuz cuz cuz cuz of the Buffy guest star! ISEEWHATYOUDIDTHERE

    Also, your caption for the Spielberg pic is possibly the best thing ever.

    1. You got me, Z. :) And thank you, I was quite proud of finding that picture.