Wednesday, 10 September 2014

Dawson's Creek - 306 - Secrets and Lies

Original air date: November 10, 1999

Welcome back to another Creek recap. Last episode was rage inducing and I thought this one would be too but it more just makes me sad. Let's take a look and see why. 

Jen is complaining to Dawson about being made Capeside's homecoming Queen and how she's turning into her mother. This is apparently horrific to her because she doesn't want to be just a vapid high society girl. Dawson, to his credit, actually tries to make her feel better about her situation. They run into the school's guidance councillor and he introduces Jen to all of the previous homecoming queens. I seriously didn't realize it was such a huge deal that all past generations of homecoming queens came to meet the new ones. That's weird. Americans have weird obsessions with high school stuff.

Anyway, one of them is named Constance Freckling and is the oldest living "HQ" which apparently entitles her to be like the president of homecoming and throwing homecoming dances or something to do with organizing it. I guess she's rich and has a huge house that she offers up to the occasion. Jen is less than thrilled.

I hope you don't try to shock me with your
sexy, non-religious, and rebellious ways

Pacey and Joey are at her place and talking to Bessie about the fact that they are turning their home into a bed and breakfast. Now, they are adding an addition or something but I'm still confused because I thought they lived in a hovel that was so tiny that Joey couldn't have a bedroom. Am I just making that up? I thought she'd complained about having to be in the living room or something. Whatever, now their place is big enough to house them and to have people stay the night or weekend. I'm guessing the addition will be the extra bedrooms needed but if I'm right about Joey's living situation then burn on her. Guests get bedrooms before Poor!Joey.

Pacey asks Joey if she's alright because he's an awesome friend and way better than Dawson in every way. Joey admits that she's nervous about opening a bed and breakfast and really wants it to work out as they are putting most of the insurance money into it. I guess they've decided to completely abandon the Ice House? She also mentions that she does not want to ever go back to working at the marina. Pacey asks her what happened with her creep boss and Joey says that it's a long story because she clearly doesn't want to tell him about Andie being stupid enough to date said jerk. Because Pacey is awesome, he calls her out on her half lie and forces her to tell him about it and Joey admits that it's Andie and Pacey has a sad.

Awwww, I want to give him a hug

Dawson walks into his kitchen to find his mother there. He asks her what brings her back to town and she admits to being a former HQ from an "undisclosed year in the late seventies." Mitch teases her a bit and they make awkward conversation until Gail mentions that she's going to need a date and asks Dawson who looks extremely uncomfortable as his father is standing right there.


Pacey and Joey are sitting together at lunch when Andie just comes and joins them like it's no big she cheated on Pacey and inadvertently got Joey fired from her job. Pacey bails quickly and Andie asks if Joey told him about Rob. Joey admits that it slipped out over breakfast which piques Andie's curiosity but Joey explains that Pacey has been helping her and Bessie build the bed and breakfast that they need to open soon so that they can barely scrape by. Andie immediately comes back with that it wasn't her fault that Joey got fired and then gushes about how much she likes Rob. Why? He was an asshole to your supposed friend, Andie. Joey tells Andie that she can do whatever she wants.


Jen goes to visit Miss Freckling to basically tell her that she didn't really ask to be an HQ. Miss Freckling shoots back that she didn't ask for Jen either and that most girls who come through her door are super excited to be where she is. I kind of have to agree. I mean, some girls want nothing more to be HQ of their school, so I hear, it would suck if the person who won was all "Wah! Why am I an HQ? This is stupid! I don't want to do this!" Jen, you're not being a very good sport about this and if you really didn't want to be an HQ, couldn't you just have declined the title and given it to someone who really wanted it? But no, plot contrivances dictate that Jen must go through with it because it's funny to force her to do something she doesn't want.

Jen hears a loud bump upstairs and Miss Freckling explains that her handy boy, Hank, is setting up twinkle lights on her roof. I'm just going to show you a shot of her house:

Check this behemoth out and note how high the roof is

Kind of got a feel for its size now? Ok, so Jen basically leaves after Miss Freckling gives her a talking to about bucking up, showing poise and wearing a bra which made me laugh because yeah, these girls hardly ever wear a bra on this show. It's very noticeable. Jen leaves in a huff and this happens:


Ok, look at the house and then remember, it was specifically said that he was on the roof putting twinkle lights up. He totally should not have come out of that fall completely unscathed. That just makes no sense. However, Capeside logic dictates that we are just supposed to laugh at the zaniness and forget about the laws of gravity. Also, Hank is apparently Henry. Joy.

He screams at her that there are bees and tells her to run for her life and literally all I can think of is this:

Not the bees! Not the bees!

Pacey and Joey are hanging out at her place, fixing up the addition when Bessie comes in with the phone. She says it's for Joey and that whoever it is sounds upset. Joey answers and we hear Andie crying on the other end and asking for Joey's help.

She was at Rob's house for a party and so Pacey and Joey arrive there to find Andie crying outside under a tree. Pacey and Joey get her to tell them what happened to make her upset and Andie claims that Rob attempted to rape her but failed. She tries to tell them that it was no big and that she just wants to go home but Pacey isn't having it and runs into the house to find Rob.

Take that, you creepy fuck!

Apparently Jen and Hank/Henry have been hiding from the bees in a greenhouse for some time because they ran away in daylight but it is now night time. Jen admires the flowers and Hank-ry tells her some of the names which sound suggestive. This makes Jen laugh a bit and teases Hank-ry. She complains about Miss Freckling but Hank-ry explains that she's just lonely and that the HQ is one of the only things she has in her life. That is fucking depressing. He also tells Jen that Miss F was looking forward to meeting her because he told her all about Jen. Why does that sound creepy to me?

Anyway, we cut back to Pacey, Joey, and Andie. Joey is trying to convince Andie to go to the police but she refuses because she insists nothing really happened anyway. Joey then tries to convince Andie to stay over at her place because she shouldn't be alone. Wow, Joey is a super awesome friend this season. Good job, Joey. Andie doesn't want to though and Pacey offers to take care of her.

We cut back to Miss Freckling's house where Hank-ry has taken Jen back in to see her. He's all, I bumped into Jen outside and convinced her to come back in and I expected her to be like "My word! That was four hours ago, what the fuck were you two doing?" Because that's what I would've asked if I were her. She is in Capeside time too though so she seems unfazed by their re-entry at night time when Jen clearly left when the sun was up. Jen and Miss Freckling make up and begin to plan the HQ gala. Jen then mentions that Hank-ry will be her date.

Don't do it, Jen!

Pacey has taken Andie to his boat and she mentions that the name for his boat is ironic. Not sure why but I guess because she figured he didn't believe in it because he broke up with her...because she cheated on him? Whatever, he explains that he brought her to his boat to show her that he's ok and is trying to make something beautiful out of his heartache. She says she's not ok and is not over him and wants to get back together. Pacey is all "nah, not doing that again." but Andie is insistent that they belong together and keeps putting the moves on him. He keeps turning her down because he knows it's not cool to do this on the same night she supposedly almost got raped but Andie's just like "well if me getting almost raped gets us back together then I'm cool!" Which raises some major red flags with me. Pacey caves and they end up kissing.

The next morning Andie is all super happy and chipper about what happened and wants to know if Pacey is feeling the same way. He claims he is but you can tell that he's unsure of them getting back together so quickly.

Rob goes to Joey's house to plead his case which makes no fucking sense because why does he care what his ex-employee thinks of him? It makes a little more sense when he asks her if Andie has gone to the police, I guess he wanted to get info on how fucked he might be. He admits that he did knowingly sexually harass Joey but that it's totally different from sexual assault. Joey tells him he can draw his own line in the sand if he wants but that both are against the law. She tries to slam the door in his face repeatedly but he keeps grabbing her and begging her to believe him that he would never force himself on a woman. He'd have an easier time convincing Joey of this if he wasn't constantly forcing her not to leave by grabbing her.


At the HQ gala, Miss Freckling is apparently quite satisfied with the way everything is going. Dawson and Mitch are talking when two characters that we'll never see again come up and start talking to them about Gail's job in Philly. She tries to retreat but not before the bitchy woman blabs about the fact that it was absurd that Gail was fired for being too old for the pubic to relate to. The characters then disappear into the land of forgotten side characters having served their sole purpose for being. Dawson asks his mother what the hell happened in Philly and why she didn't say anything about it.

Jen and Hank-ry enter the party looking completely stupid or perhaps they were going for rebellious? I don't know what look they were trying for but all I can see when I look at Hank-ry is Austin Powers.

Yeah, baby!

Miss Freckling is upset with their attire and demands they go change. She admonishes Hank-ry for dressing the way he did because no one should dress up like Austen Powers. No one. Jen says that she put him up to it and smugly says that she hasn't seen anything yet. Cue the drag queens to enter and Miss Freckling's shocked face. Oooooh, Jen is shocking old people with her crazy sexual, non-god-faring ways again!

Andie and Joey are talking and Joey asks if she's told her dad about the almost assault. Andie is weirdly nonchalant about her almost rape and acts like it's completely no big and that she doesn't need to tell her dad because nothing really happened. Joey is as confused by her behaviour as I am and she tells Andie about Rob coming by her place to plead his innocence. Andie accuses Joey of siding with Rob but Joey says she isn't but wants to make sure that they are doing the right thing by not going to the police. She feels awful about not reporting Rob herself because then maybe Andie wouldn't have been hurt. Andie then says, in the creepiest way possible, that maybe all of it happened for a reason and that something good came out of it. Joey is like "what the fuck are you talking about?" and Andie explains that she and Pacey are back together as of last night while giving the creepiest look possible.

Her stare gives me the wiggins. Her whole attitude, lately, does

Back at the HQ gala, the drag queens are performing "It's Raining Men", naturally, and Hank-ry worries about Miss Freckling being pissed at him. Jen claims that he won't be in trouble because deep down, she's sure that Miss Freckling "gets it". Homecoming Queens or Drag Queens, they are all just people playing dress up. She then asks Hank-ry to dance. Meanwhile, Miss Freckling is doing the most awkward toe-tap of all time:

Of all time!

Andie stops by where Pacey is working on his boat and gives him a skipper's hat. Pacey starts to talk about wondering whether he'll be able to fix the boat again and Andie acts all concerned because they are really talking about whether they can rebuild their relationship. She asks him to stop with the boat metaphor and Pacey admits that he thinks they made a mistake last night. Andie says they didn't because she felt super happy about it. Pacey says it felt like he did the wrong thing and Andie accuses him of punishing her. He tells her he isn't but that maybe she slept with that guy because it was her heart's way of telling her that she and Pacey aren't meant to be. Pacey then admits that his heart is telling him that she isn't the one for him either. Andie gets understandably upset and runs off as Pacey tries to apologize for hurting her.

Jen apologizes to Miss Freckling and admits that she was trying to shock her. Miss Freckling is cool with it but wants to clear things up about Hank-ry. Jen tells her it's just a crush but Miss Freckling says that he likes her a hell of a lot but she can tell Jen doesn't feel the same way. Jen admits that she doesn't like Hank-ry and Miss Freckling tells her to stop leading him on then. She knows that's the path that will lead to Jen's body being dragged out of the creek.

Because, as we've discussed, Henry is a serial killer

Jen confronts Hank-ry and basically tells him that she does not like him in that way. He tells her that he's in love with her and both Jen and I laugh at that because he barely knows a thing about her beyond, "she's hot." He protests a little bit but Jen basically tells him it's never going to happen and then Hank-ry runs off to plan her murder crying.

Gail finally tells Dawson about Philly and the fact that she was fired and was too ashamed to admit it. He encourages her to talk to Mitch about it all because she could use a friend. That feels a little Dawson is only encouraging her to do it in the hopes that they'll get back together but it is nice, I guess. Gail is not too keen on running back home but agrees to talk to Mitch about everything.

Andie confronts Joey and accuses her of telling Pacey that she made the whole story up to get him back. Joey didn't and tells her that she hadn't seen Pacey since they dropped her off. Andie doesn't quite believe this and basically admits to making everything up just to play into Pacey's hero complex and win him back.

I think I just might be worn out from all the raging last week but I just can't be as pissed as I want to be about this. Morally, lying about a rape or even an attempted rape is so wrong because it basically gives ammunition to people that like to give actual victims of sexual assault a hard time. It is completely, undeniably, unquestionably a reprehensible thing to do and I have lost all respect for this character but at the same time, it's also extremely sloppy writing. This is a girl who has severe mental and emotional problems to the point that she was sent to a specialty home/hospital thing to take care of it and while it is mentioned in this episode, it is only mentioned by the guy who is definitely a creep as a way to knock down her accusation. In reality, her behaviour the past few episodes should be a major red flag to all of her friends and family that maybe she should be sent back to the hospital because she just doesn't seem ready to be out and on her own. So, in that regard I do feel bad for her.

So, while I want to be angry, at this point, I am just tired. Exhausted with this show and it's treatment of women. Rob was set up to be a complete prick and completely capable of forcing himself on a girl but instead, once again, the girl is the villain here because she was just lying in order to get her boyfriend back. I think this is a pretty irresponsible storyline because instead of using this storyline as a way to get her some much needed help, it is basically one big "see? Women lie about rape all the time just to get what they want" and nothing more. Rob is innocent which is laughable because he has been extremely inappropriate with both Joey and even dating Andie in the first place. But that is wiped away because Andie was this big, crazy evil mastermind who lied about everything. I could almost get behind this reveal and the whole thing with the PSATs if the writers had been willing to address her mental issues again, other than using it for their gross creeper character's excuse as to why she'd be lying. They needed to take the time to have Andie be like "I'm not ok, I think I still need help." but instead, they'll pretend like none of this happened in the next episode. So, I'm just tired at this point.

We get it, writers. Women are evil

We end with a montage that sees Jen sitting with Miss Freckling and the Drag Queens, Henry walking alone and looking like he's either sad or constipated, Gail and Mitch talking, and Joey consoling Andie. The end.

That was Secrets and Lies and you know what? I actually don't mind this episode that much. It's more boring than anything but I'll give it that it focused more on characters I actually don't mind and less on Dawson which was nice. I remember being really happy that Jen finally settled things with Henry and that he would be gone but unfortunately, I was wrong. He does come back. Also, how stupid was it that Miss Freckling called him "Hank"? It was obviously just so we'd be all surprised when it turned out to actually be Henry. Blah.

After these last few episodes of boredom, rage and sadness, I am super stoked for next week's episode. You have no idea how much I've been looking forward to it. It's terrible but it's memorable and actually entertainingly stupid so it will be a breath of fresh air to me. Stay tuned for the hilarious Blair Witch rip-off that is Escape From Witch Island.

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